Do you have a dream you’re holding close to your heart?
Maybe so close it can’t breathe, expand, and come into life?
What are you waiting for?
I don’t ask this question lightly. Dig deep. Question logic. Look twice, or even three times. It’s easy to fool yourself, to sound oh-so-reasonable.
For a few months now, I have neglected my newly-hatched book. I had a plan, you see. January was the month to clean up loose ends at maiatoll.com, in Witch Camp and Sage School. By February 19th, when I leave for a writing retreat, Witch Camp was to have a brand new membership area and Sage School’s application for nursing C.E.s was to be complete.
We’re on track for Sage School, but my big plans for Witch Camp ran into a tech SNAFU that’s going to take some time and energy to sort.
Yesterday I heard a little voice in my head saying I guess this isn’t the year of the book after all.
With a little distance, this reasoning is obviously ridiculous. What? I can’t walk and chew gum at the same time?
But up close, my logic made sense to me: writing my book is a luxury, my business is my livelihood. Take care of business before you do anything else, I told myself.
I was buying it—for about twenty-seven minutes.
I was hopping in the queue to become a lady-in-waiting.
It was actually that phrase “lady-in-waiting” that pulled me out of my tailspin.
I started to remember the other times I’ve used that phrase:
- When I wasn’t buying new clothes because I was waiting to lose 10 pounds.
- When I wasn’t taking days off because I was waiting for my husband to take a day off with me (which is hard when you have a new store that’s open 7 days a week).
- When I wasn’t having friends to dinner because I was waiting for my kitchen to be renovated (which actually relates to not posting recipes on maiatoll.com because I might have to take photos or a video and my kitchen is light years from Martha Stewart’s. You can see I got over this one. These grain-free chocolate chip cookies were too good to keep to myself!)
There are sometimes really smart reasons to wait, to pause. To let the seed spend some time in the cool earth, dreaming itself into being. But there is also a time to stick up a little green tendril, to taste the air and feel the sun. Which of your dreams are ready to be?
I think of it this way:
On the whole, when I look back on my life, I regret the things I didn’t do, not the things I’ve done.
When we had Thanksgiving this year, the 50s kitchen didn’t dampen the conversation or dry out the turkey.
And once I let go of the guilt, a day off did my soul a hell of a lot of good.
Sometimes it’s the doing that makes the next thing possible.
For years I said I’ll exercise when my back feels good.
Lo and behold, I finally gave that up and started exercising… and it fixed up my back issues.
I’m not thinking that working on my book will cure my tech woes. But you never know.
So… what are you waiting for? Share here!